There's something on military bases called the public address system. There are speakers throughout the base and sometimes people make announcements over them. Most of the time there will be warnings about inclement weather. For example, in Oklahoma, they'd announce when a tornado was close and to get into your shelter. Stat.
A lot of people on base call it "the big voice." Sometimes it has startled me. Other times I have no idea what it's saying because the voice comes out garbled. I once went, "What?" after it spoke as if I expected it to repeat itself.
My husband has been in the military 16 years, and we've lived on base for 15 of them. So I've had a lot of experience with the "big voice." Here's what I thought it said:
1. "Exercise." I mean, it did say that, but I totally thought it was telling me to exercise and I was offended and was about to be all snappy fingers and be like, "Excuse ME?" It turns out it was just letting everyone know that the BASE was doing an exercise which basically means some gates might be closed or you'll see soldiers run past with weapons pretending that someone has snuck on base.
2. "Let's play a game." What the living hell, did I end up in The Hunger Games? Should I quickly learn how to use a bow and arrow? I honestly never found out what it really said. Or maybe there was some base wide game going on? I don't know.
3. "Go get some fries." I was super hungry at the time. I think it really just said "exercise." But when my stomach is growling, everything is about food.
4. "?????" Sometimes I just plain don't know what it's saying. Hence why I've shouted, "WHAT?" after an announcement many times.
5. The "big voice" once started yakking, and this was before I had my caffeine, so I thought it was God or whoever lives up there speaking to all of us on Earth. I mean, he has to be pretty upset over the state of the world right now so I started thinking, "Oh man, we're going to get it now.." Then I realized, nope, it's just military stuff.
6. "You are the best." I thought it was a motivational speaker for the day and I was like, "Aw, thanks," and then I realized it said "This is a test," to make sure it was working properly. Oh.
Do you have a "big voice" in your area? Do you know what's it's saying?
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LMFAO.
ReplyDeleteNot sure there is a big voice in my area. If there is a voice telling to get fries, it's mine in my head ahah. xx corinne
ReplyDeletehahah why did I laugh so hard at this. What an experience it must be!
ReplyDeleteLol, this is so funny. I don't have a big voice personally that I listen all the time. But there are time when I can't understand anything coming over a loud speaker, lol.
ReplyDeleteThis was such a refreshing read..I have not experienced such big voices n if ever heard, will for sure have similar interpretation..
ReplyDeleteI think we all have some kind of "Big voice" and I totally talk to my big voice and refer to him as God. Problem is, I don't know the difference between what God wants me to do and what I'm just telling myself to do and trying to convince myself its the right thing to do lol.
ReplyDeleteHaha, I can never seem to understand what people are saying over a speaker system. I hate ordering food on the phone too because I am bad understanding accents too!
ReplyDeleteNot exactly a big voice but there used to be a newspaper seller near the bus station who I always thought was shouting "URINAL". Years later I found out he was actually shouting "LATE FINAL".
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA! This is too cute! I was in the military and totally know what you mean about the "big voice"! This post gave me fond memories and made me laugh!
ReplyDeleteAlthough I do not have personal experience with the Big Voice, I can see how easy it would be to mishear words coming from a large PA system. That type of thing happens to me quite often with song lyrics.
ReplyDeleteROFL "Go get some fries!" is my fav or course! I would have done what the big voice demanded! I can only imagine some of the things you think you hear but the most frustrating would be those that are totally garbled and make no sense at all!
ReplyDeleteI mean COME ON some of those messages are SUPER important right? Should any of them really be garbled!
Haha great post thank you for the laughs I TRULY needed this today!
Omg haha! That would honestly creep me out a bit! Hearing all that mumbo jumbo 24/7 lol
ReplyDeleteOf all the times I have been on various bases, I have yet to figure out what they are saying. It's worse than the subway announcer.
ReplyDeleteI could totally get behind a voice telling me, "Go get some fries." I hate listening to things over loudspeakers because I hardly ever understand the words.
ReplyDeleteLOL! This is funny but also creepy! I have never heard anything like this in the UK but I would to hear someone say 'go get some fries!'
ReplyDeleteWe do not have a big voice in our area. I would definitely go get fries if it told me to lol. I would like the weather warnings.
ReplyDeleteHaha the comments made me laugh. I have to say not really sure about the big voice but I am forever mishearing what people are saying. I have a great one, I had a teacher tell me about Jesus's erection' and presumed I heard wrong. I didn't hear wrong, he definitely said it as the whole class started laughing and he went red. I think he meant Resurrection lol x
ReplyDeletehahaha this is so funny!! Although I don't have any experience with the big voice, but I am always doing that with songs on the radio!
ReplyDeleteWe have one of those here and when I moved to this town, I was really freaked out at first. I grew up in the city where this would never happen so I had no idea until my neighbor explained. lol
ReplyDeleteLOL! I can relate to number 3, I think it's our brain, it plays tricks on us, but hey, when I hear fries I go and get fries :)
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ReplyDeleteI always love reading your blog posts but this one really made me chuckle! Would have loved to have seen your face when the Big Voice told you to go and exercise! Classic!
I have a big voice and I always argue with whatever it says, HA!!! Love your posts!!
ReplyDeleteNo big voice near us. But your post was hilarious. I guess I could relate it to back in high school during announcements though!
ReplyDeleteEasily one of the most entertaining posts I've read! And it reminds me of a lot of the things I hear haha
ReplyDeleteLol. Number three is my favorite. Nope, we don't have a big voice here.
ReplyDelete?????? .. funny one .. Yes it happens many time .. just the feel but no thoughts .!
ReplyDeletelol! I am never sure what the big voice could be saying in my life. But I am sure that I would be getting all the wrong signals like here. And when it says exercise I am never sure if it's a critique or an encouragement.
ReplyDeleteThese are so interesting. I don't live near a military base, so this is very informative. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteXOXO //SINCERELY OPHELIA | NYC Petite Fashion Blogger
Hahaha! That was hysterical. I don't have a big voice I listen to but, on occasion, when I take the subway or metro, they have PAs that make no sense too.
ReplyDeleteYour too funny... i ignore my big voice all the time. This reminds me the saying... " Exercise?? Oh i thought you said Extra-Fries" lol
ReplyDeleteHahaha I love Army wives so this is how I am picturing it! Haha at least you have had many years of entertainment from the voice!
ReplyDeleteHaha..It is hilarious the way you have described this Big Voice thing.Enjoyed reading it.
ReplyDeleteQuite hilarious! I've never experienced listening to "The Big Voice" before as we don't live anywhere near a military base. It was fun reading what you misheard though. ---Marceline Dementori
ReplyDeleteAh, I'm not sure how I handle a big voice telling me what to do. Even in walmart I can't make out what they say on the PA. Sometimes they test the emergency response systems here and my first thoughts are available, "its the purge" or "the zombies are coming." Great post!
ReplyDeleteMy cravings scream for ice cream and fries ( just kidding) Not sure if there is a Big Voice in the are but I hear chirping noise in our backyard that saying get up and be active. :)
ReplyDeleteThis is too funny! I've never experienced this before other than from camp or from our school when I was younger. It was always easy to understand though not like this one!
ReplyDeleteI honestly wasn't sure what "the big voice" was til I read your post. I've never listened to this before. I enjoyed reading through your list though.
ReplyDeleteI've never heard of "the big voice" before and it sounds quite hilarious! It reminds me of the Big Brother TV reality show!
ReplyDeleteI only know that I would love to hear 'You are the best' :D even every day
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh - this is too funny! I don't live on a military base, so don't have a big voice, but I think your reactions to those were hilarious!
ReplyDeleteI loved this post .We have loudspeakers during some festivals when for the life of me I can't make out what they said .Impossible!
ReplyDeletelol Like the teacher PA system in the schools or the speaker at the drive in. I can relate. ;)
ReplyDeleteHilarious! We don't live on base, but we live near one. I've heard a few things here and there but I never understood what it was saying.
ReplyDeletelol... what an entertaining read! it's always nice to break away from the usual posts that sell things, etc... I never experienced this but I feel like I lived it vicariously through you ; )
ReplyDeletehahah.. "you are the best." Oh, if only. And the one about fries.
ReplyDeleteNo big voices where I live, unless you count my own. I think I would be so startled by this, though!
😂😂😂, this made me laugh so hard. Ive never had such experience and no big voices where i live.Still laughing...
ReplyDelete😂😂😂, this made me laugh so hard. Ive never had such experience and no big voices where i live.Still laughing...
ReplyDeleteWow I never knew about big voices but I'd be completely baffled most the time lol. I just love the hunger game reference. It'd be a bit creepy too. lol.
ReplyDeleteI think this could be a funny experience for me. We also have this "big voice" back home. It always announces coming typhoon. If you are not used to it, it will make you nervous :)
ReplyDeleteI do not have a big voice talking, but I have 5 little voices, my kids, constantly telling me what they want to do!
ReplyDeleteI really thought the big voice was God. Wow I didnt know they did this on military bases.
ReplyDeleteThis had me laughing out loud, with tears spilling out of my eyes!! Because these are all SO true!!! Hahaha!! Thank you for putting these into words... I will be sharing this because it is 1.) Hysterical; 2.) True!!
ReplyDeleteBAHAHAHAHA
ReplyDeleteOne time the big voice came on while I was still sleeping. It sounded just like a car with loudspeaker in Italy that drove around our neighborhood. They were either protesting something or selling something from their car. (I never did find out which) But when I heard it at Lackland I was so confused and half asleep, I couldn't figure out where I was or what was happening.
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